A wise person wins friends. Proverbs 11:30
Wise words will win you a good meal. Proverbs 13:2
There is a way of winning people as you go about your normal daily life. This will help your ‘social mobility’. That is your influence socially, communally and economically. Here are some basic starters for good social practice:
– Listen more than Talk
There is nothing more off putting than someone who talks incessantly and especially about themselves. Remember conversation by very nature is a 2-way exercise. I say something then I leave a space for you to say something. We were born with 2 ears and 1 mouth, suggesting the proportion of use of each body part!
Learn to be interested in others more than yourself. This alone will win you friends, new clients and progress your social mobility.
– Be agreeable
Be an easy sort of person to communicate with. The best way to do this is to not be argumentative. Not be the “Yes but …” person, rather the “Yes and …” person.
Gods ways are not our ways. What we feel we should do instinctively is often opposite of what God would do. We want to disagree, correct, we think helping another to succeed disadvantages us, we think keeping our ‘mood’ obvious is being ‘authentic’ – but in all cases the opposite is true. You will lose and not win people this way.
Learn to agree more than disagree. To overlook more than correct … SMILE & BE NICE!
– Be appropriate
It is important we adjust our behaviour depending on the age, gender and role of the person we are talking to. For example, when you talk to a person older than yourself like someone your own age you dis-empower them from being to you what they need to be – maturity and wisdom. The ability to adjust our demeanor is a sign of mature social mobility.
– Remain flexible
A rigid person feels like an obstacle in your world, and probably therefore avoided next time. When we learn to flex and flow we win people. “No not possible, that’s my meal time” or “Yeah sure, love to, can we make it a little later.” Those that will move things for you have won your heart instantly.
An apology goes a long way in winning people. It may not even be fully your fault, but to be flexible enough to see the value of the relationship over the issue at hand is wise.
– Like people
God extravagantly likes. Let’s be too, forgive & enjoy people. Find something to rejoice about, bring joy. Make yourself an enjoyable person to be around. Its easy to spot someone who clearly isn’t enjoying the interaction, or is distracted. Stay focused and choose to place people high on your like list!
Believing for your social upward mobility today. See you in Church.
Good thinking and well said Steve. Simply courtesy goes a long way – something some have forgotten to their detriment. Being interested is more than a technique – it is a heart motivation to others.
Thanks Simon, absolutely.
Great blog !!
great advice stave – practical, relevant & inspiring!
sorry Steve – auto-spelling corrector thought that meant “stave”
Stellar advice Steve which you model very well
Thanks John. Actually it takes one to know one!
Very educating, Ps. Steve. Nice to share with friends. Thanks a lot for the insights. (^_^)
Great stuff Ps. Steve! Love that it’s so practical.
Loey great blog start I noticed
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